Last Christmas

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart! The very next day, you gave it away…”

When we say we ♥ this song, please know that it’s in the most ironic of ways because… you GUYS, it’s awful. It gets stuck in your head and worms its way into your brain, LODGING itself there for days on end.

We refuse to believe that anyone out there hears this song on the radio and gets legitimately excited. “Hey Bob, turn this bad boy UP!” Yeah, those words have never been spoken in reference to Last Christmas by Wham!.

Not once.

Seriously… ever.

The song debuted in 1984, and while it never made it to the top spot on Britain’s charts, it did make to #2.  Unfortunately for Wham! (but fortunately for the rest of the population), they had to compete with Frankie Goes To Hollywood and Bob Geldof’s Band-Aid project that year.

Looks like George and Andrew had the last laugh, though; we’re now in the 2000s and their gooey song is STILL making it into the top five of Germany’s Singles Charts.

WHAT IS THAT ABOUT?

Why, Germany? Wasn’t Hitler enough??

The video itself is quite possible THE cheesiest video to ever show up on MTV, and that is saying a lot. The guys arrive at some unnamed ski resort, where they’re met by people who (based on the excitement in their waving) haven’t laid eyes on anyone else for days. (Run, George! This could easily be the beginning of a horror movie!)

But then… the solemn looks-into-the-distance begin, and we’re lead to believe that this year won’t be all fun and games, like last year. And then! (THEN!) We find out that George’s singing partner in crime, Andrew Ridgeley is the guy who stole his girl! (That had to make for awkward rehearsals.)

Let’s take a minute to point out some other ridiculous moments, shall we?

Really, guy? You need both arms to carry all that wood? And what is with that little jig in your step and that grin on your face? Quit it.

Really, George? First day with the new hands? Or was the tinsel just that squirrely that you couldn’t hold onto it a second longer?

Really, George? You look more like a girl when you’re running through the snow than SHE does… And quit pouting in your snow boots by the fence. You’re bringing us all down.

Really, people? Like ANY of you have ever had skis on your feet. This is the most pathetic bunch of “skiers” we’ve ever witnessed. EVER.

So there we have it. The one bright spot on the dark cloud of MTV no longer playing videos. But, still– it came from our favorite decade, and sometimes that’s all that it takes.

We ♥ Last Christmas.

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~ by weheart80s on December 14, 2011.

One Response to “Last Christmas”

  1. How is it possible this song has been tolerated for decades?! What is wrong with people!?

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